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Claiming myself back: Why was tipping the scale necessary? #MyFriendAlexa

My wittiest humour fell short of words trying to find an apt sneer for what lay in front of my eyes. The real me, hidden under umpteen dreadful folds of skin, pleaded to be released from the lumpy cage. The scale, while encountering appalling disappointment and few unshed tears, was spared from facing the brunt. Sure this wasn’t alarming but was waiting till then a wise step?

Blame it on my Marwari genes or Mom’s awesome cooking, my battle with weight started in my adolescent years itself. I was an awkward teenager who was never picked for sports or school dances. When classmates viciously guffawed at my baggy clothing I retaliated by stuffing my face with more potato chips and stepping into isolation. I should’ve known and done better then. Sigh!

Now years, marriage and two kids later I was face-to-face with the same girl. The chubby cheeks and wide frame conveniently masqueraded the solid efforts I had taken to not be the same fat girl again. I disliked and disapproved of everything I saw. Foolishly, I looked around for a sign, some divine Akashwani type intervention or some earth-shattering occurence to get the big bulk of me moving. It obviously didn’t happen.

Do we need to look around for motivation?

Why should someone push us for what’s good for us?

Aren’t we responsible for our own well-being?

Revelation happens in a moment though; unannounced and quite unexpectedly. Looking at the mirror, “This is too much and I need to do something about it!” was all the motivation I needed. My wardrobe had stacks of beautiful dresses that were hardly worn and I was determined to adorn them soonest. Looking at them fondly, I promised myself a makeover. I owed this to that teenager who sacrificed skirts and jeans and settled for loose-fitting salwar suits in college.

A maintained that he ‘loves me the way I am’ but my self-love needed more convincing than that. I decided to make the scale my friend and work with it as a team. Wouldn’t it be happier to feel less burdened by my awesomeness? 😉

I idolise Monica’s character in Friends and Kajol in real life for conducting themselves the way they do. They’re both gorgeous women whose beauty isn’t just about looking good. I know ‘what’s inside matters the most’ but it doesn’t hurt if the exterior gives a tempting befitting glimpse of it, right?

Stay with me as I take you on a non-preachy and personal journey through the last few months of ‘Claiming myself back’ in this year’s #MyFriendAlexa activity. I’m hoping that jotting it down will prove as a keepsake for me in future and/or serve as a wake-up call to anyone who might need it.

Thanks for reading. Please do share your thoughts with me.

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135 Comments

  1. Natasha says:

    That sounds like one heck of an interesting journey. Joining you Varsh.

    1. Thank you so much, Natasha. Do stay with me. Would love it!

  2. A promising first post that has made me curious enough to know more.
    Going to be following your posts, Varsha.

    1. Thanks, M. Glad you liked it. Would look forward to your feedback. 🙂

  3. That was a lovely post varsha. I can relate myself.. Looming forward to read more.

    1. Thank you, Deepa. Would be glad to walk you through my journey. 🙂

  4. We all go through different phases in life and every stage we need to work and do some makeup for our body and mind to fit and fine. It is all in the mind and the moment we are determined rest all becomes mere mechanical activity.

    #MyFriendAlexa, #MakeupReads

    1. That’s so true, Nihar. The mind needs to be conditioned and made up before anything else. A little bit of effort for a healthy body and life is a small price to pay in the long run.
      Thanks for reading.

      1. Indeed, it is all in our mind and what matters is how we train our mind.
        Varsh, it was good to in your place.
        😀

  5. Hi Varsh,

    Very well written post which has increased my curiosity to know more. Good start, I hope to read the next installment soon.

    Thanks for sharing, have a great day. 🙂

    1. Thank you, Sajid. Glad you liked my post. The next installment is up now. I hope you’ll read it when time permits. 🙂

  6. Anagha Yatin says:

    Never underestimate the power of the self motivated, spirited girl on her way to reclaim back! And knowing you, I can safely say that the posts ahead would give us the most no preachy but most practical ways to beat the flab at its own game and emerge winner.
    Look forward to your post chronicling the journey of claiming back self.

    1. Wow, I feel like lady Shahrukh right now! 😀
      Thank you so much, Anagha. You know me well. I’m sharing my personal journey here and any takeaways are for the reader to find out and follow.

  7. Noorain says:

    That was a great post and I believe in the fact that it’s the inside that matters the most, but then.. you must take care of your body as well.. it’s the only one we’ve got!❤️

    1. Glad you agree. Thanks for reading.

  8. Hey Varsha, I adored Monica’s character too. And do what keeps you happy. 😀

    1. That’s great, Huma. Thanks for reading.

  9. Looking forward to reading about your journey. And it isn’t striving for the perfect look but being and feeling healthier physically and mentally.

    1. Right, Sangeeta. A happy state of mind is a great space to be in. Perfect look is just a by-product.

  10. I have always maintained that motivation has to be intrinsic. And your post goes on to define just that. All the best with your efforts. The results are amazing!

    1. Thanks, Anupriya. Motivational messages don’t work for me. It either comes from within or doesn’t. 🙂

  11. I loved the way you have written it. Thanks for sharing

    1. Thanks Hema.

  12. I am sure going to be here to read about your journey…this is going to be fun and great learning month

    1. Thanks Ruchie.

  13. Self motivation is the best motivation. Looking forward to knowing more about your journey.

    1. Thanks Purba.

  14. That is exactly how I felt in college too! I would surely love to read more about this in your future posts

    1. That’s good to know. Stay with me for more. Thanks. 🙂

  15. I can relate with your feelings as you started this makeover journey. Glad you took charge to keep your self happy and love little more. Looking forward to your journey

    1. Thank you Pragnya.

  16. Ok, I have fastened my seat belts and all set for this journey!

    The Solitary Writer

    1. Thank you.

  17. Inspiring journey, Varsha. Weight loss is the hardest to undertake and even more harder to sustain in the long term. Good luck!

    1. Thank you so much, Lavanya!

  18. jaya1966 says:

    I was a lean, muscular youth when I was in college. But a sedentary lifestyle and a desk job has added oodles of fat to my body and now I closely resemble a sack of potatoes :). I need to take a leaf out of your book and reclaim myself. I keep planning it as a new year resolution every time but fail to keep up the momentum after a few days. Look forward to reading further posts. #MyFriendAlexa #JaiSReads

    1. The new year resolution high fades within a day, Jai. If you want to do it, just pick a random day which wouldn’t ask a lot from you. I don’t even remember the day of my big revelation but it indeed pushed me enough to reach here.
      All the best for reclaiming yourself. Deep down you aren’t a potato. Just remember that. 🙂

  19. Hi, few months back I had also made friends with my scale and trust me when you realize to do something for yourself it is the best thing. All the best to you in this journey.

    1. Thanks Shubhra. Hope you’re still at it. 🙂

  20. inspiration is very essential to claim ourselves back as you’ve quoted. Loosing weight is very difficult for me too… i lack motivation.

  21. This is surely going to increase the curiosity level for many! Nice one 🙂

  22. Woohoo! All the best to you, girl! I started my journey to feel better and fit few weeks ago. It feels great to love yourself and take care of the body and soul.

  23. It is good that you have come to this decision on your own. So the effort will be sincere. Because you will be your own judge. True, what is inside that counts. But if I do not like the outer cover, I may not venture into exploring what is inside. From an individuals point of view, self esteem is very important. For lesser mortals, looks give a sense of self esteem. Finally, looking good if that involves shedding a few grams, it is good of long term health as it stops disease. Good luck and god bless.

  24. All of us have experienced these feelings more often than not in our lives. Yet it feels pleasurable to read your journey of self motivation to stay healthy and fit. Keep up the hard work. I am sure your posts are not at all preachy in any way and wont be in future too.

  25. I like Monica’s character too. Best wishes for killing the carbs.

  26. We all need a bit of self motivation and direction and we are good to go. You have both. Waiting to see whatsw gonna happen 😃😃

    1. Thanks Ranjini.

  27. It’s great to be healthy – no doubt about that. But mental health is also important and there’s no need to find our bodies disgusting if they are not perfect. All the best for your journey

    1. How true. Thanks for reading.

  28. Its easier said than done and I am sure a lot of hard work went into it. You look great and kudos to you for an inspirational journey. Cant wait to read next part.

    1. A lot of hard work did go into it Deepa but the best part is that it was well-invested and showed results. Thank you so much!

  29. I join in this journey with you and it’s not because of the physical appearance but more about feeling good. The numerous travels have led to a weight gain and I’m sure your upcoming posts will propel me to shed them in the right manner. I’m following you. Great post!

    1. I love your travel and food pics, Dipali. I’m a vegetarian and many of them don’t appeal to me personally but I do like the tidbits you share about every place you visit. I agree weight loss is more about fitness than looking good. Motivating a woman with the latter is bit easier though. I hope I can be of some help to you.
      Thank you so much for reading. 🙂

  30. Very nice resolve, waiting to read further.

    1. Thank you so much!

  31. O too have been a chubby kid thanks to my mums excellent cooking skills. But I tried and finally lost the extra pounds.

    1. That’s great. Thanks for reading.

  32. Priyanka Naik says:

    Appearances don’t matter. But if it makes you happy and confident, I don’t see any harm in trying to improve upon them.
    Ultimately, it all boils down to how you (want to) perceive yourself!

    Cheers to your journey of self-transformation…

    1. Appearances are subjective, for some it is just about looking good and for some it is a sign of being careless and unkempt. As you rightly said, perceptions matter. For me, it was a bit of both.
      Thanks, Priyanka.

  33. This motivated me today!! I love kajol and the way she has transformed herself off late. She is my idol too 🙂

    1. Isn’t be simply gorgeous? I’m a huge fan of hers and truly admire her transformation post two kids. Thanks for reading.

  34. All the best for your journey.

    1. Thank you.

  35. Anmol Rawat says:

    Absolutely great post! I believe it’s not about the appearance as so many people believe it to be. Being in shape is more about being healthy and a healthy body is definitely what everyone should aim for.

    1. That’s true, Anmol. A healthy body is what we all should aim for. Thanks for reading.

  36. Prerna Wahi says:

    A refreshing post to read. Enjoyed it. Will look forward to more!

    1. Thank you.

  37. Sometimes all it takes is one lightbulb moment. For me it was when I was playing with my 2 year old and was out of breath in 10 mins while he could still go on and on. I started on my fitness journey 4 months ago and I am looking forward to reading about yours too.

    1. That’s great to know, Mahak. So I have another mom who’s on the same mission as me. 🙂

  38. Varsha, what an inspiring post! So many of us have many layers more around us than we need. This ought to be one interesting journey along with you. Kudos. 🙂

    1. Wouldn’t it be easier if we could peel the layers off like an onion? If only….!
      Thanks for reading, Deepti. I hope you’ll join me in this journey.

      1. If only, indeed! I would love to join you on your inspiring journey, Varsha! All the best!

        1. Thanks, Deepti.

  39. I have always been on the heavier end of the scale. But I never felt unfit nor did I ever feel the need to be bothered about how I look. It is only recently that I realized that my energy levels are getting lower. I’m unable to keep up with my toddler. Probably it is time that I take a decision too. Looking forward to reading your journey.

    1. Same here, Sonia. Although my kids keep me on my toes there was a part of me that felt exhausted and drained all the time. Working out is also the me-time that I was sorely missing. After losing weight and stressing on eating healthy I feel energetic and fresh. That indeed is a bigger perk than looking good.
      Don’t think too much and get started for your own sake. It is worth it! Thanks for reading.

  40. We can motivate others only if we stay self motivated 🙂❤️
    Wish you all the best

  41. Looking forward to know more about your story . More power to you

  42. Beauty is not about the way you look. It is about how you feel and reflect back. Self-motivation is a must to get ourselves back on the track. And we should do what makes us happy.
    Good luck with the journey of ‘Claiming yourself back’ Varsha. I’m going to stay with you.

  43. That seems like a good idea. Good luck with reclaiming yourself

  44. Love Love Love 🙂 Weight is just a number, real beauty comes from within and this makes every individual special. I’m gonna enjoy reading your journey as I have seen the transformation in the pictures.

    #vigorousreads #MyFriendAlexa

  45. Quite eager to read the journey you will be taking us along with. Marwari genes, oh! I’m too full of those Marwari genes and can understand the reason of that good fat in us;)

  46. I totally agree with you…self image takes a huge beating when one is unfit. I think our biggest enemies are our loved ones who see us as perfect. I am looking forward to reading more about your journey. Keep writing! #MyFriendAlexa #MayuraReads

  47. It was an interesting post. Looking forward to reading more from you 🙂

  48. Great Post Varsha, the reading feels like a mirror, i am a marvari too with mom having good cooking skills and weight is back knocking my door after baby.. phew.. Waiting to read more of your journey here. #Tuggunmommyreads #MyFriendAlexa

  49. Yayy. This definitely is going to be interesting. A journey of losing weight and gaining pride is something I really like. Cheers to you!

  50. I was on the opposite end, painfully thin trying hard to put on weight. Years later I did but it took a lot of soul searching to get to where ma I.

    I realised it’s not about food….

    Hugs for sharing

    #myfriendalexa #indiabeautywrites

  51. Lovely post! You’re Marwari? From where in Rajasthan btw?

  52. Interesting journey varsha. It’s not easy but once you are motivated enough, it’s not difficult either. Look forward to more in this category.

  53. Sigh! So it’s not just me. Going through this. I decided to chuck it all and focus on being healthy and shedding off that stubborn fat.

  54. I know exactly what you mean. I have been in that “stage” since over a year, and I have been putting in constant effort too. My body isnt very responsive to the methods, but for one i feel a lot more fitter.

  55. Once we turn as moms,we dont give much importance of our own well-being !!This is going to be an interesting series and lots of learning will happen for readers.

  56. Every year I take a resolution and end up not able to full it, weight lose after two kids, it feel impossible now

  57. Ashvini Naik says:

    Here’s me wishing you lots of luck, Varsha. And I love the way you’ve thought about reclaiming yourself this way. I’ll be following all your posts this month.

  58. Looking forward to reading about your journey. Sometimes when external motivation manifests we should we ready to accept it and start off.

    #MyFriendAlexa #firstgreenstep

    1. Thanks Namratha.

  59. I need this too. It would be lovely to read your journey and to get inspired by it. Looking forward to the series

    1. Thank you.

  60. Woww… This is so inspiring Varsha.. Fat or thin trying to change for better is something that should be encouraged.

    1. True. Thanks for reading.

  61. Looking forward to reading your journey! All the very best.

    1. Thanks Kalpana.

  62. People with self-motivation can find a reason and strength to complete a task, even when challenging, without giving up or needing another to encourage them and trust me it helps a lot in getting yourself back.

    1. True. Self-motivation is lot easier to sustain than having someone push us for something. It is the best thing that works for me.
      Thanks for stopping by, Roma.

  63. I feel self motivation is the best motivation and this is so inspiring. We all need this in our life.

    1. True. Thanks, Pooja.

  64. You go girl. No doubt we need to accept us how we are but there is no harm in trying to find a new version of ourselves!
    #mannreads

    1. The prospect of a new-me is indeed appealing and a big motivation for me. More people should try it too.
      Thanks for reading, Mann.

  65. I would relate to this post …perf perfectly penned…

    1. Thanks Ruchie.

  66. We all need that motivation to shed extra kilos. It is awesome to see a beautiful transformation before my eyes:)

    1. Thanks for the compliment and for reading, Aditi. 🙂

  67. very inspiring, Varsha. Will look forward to read about your journey.

    1. Thanks, Priya.

  68. Loved this post, Varsha. Hooked to your next one now.

    1. Thank you.

  69. this is a nice post loved reading it..
    #MyFriendAlexa
    #simiwrites

    1. Thanks Smitha.

  70. Loved the post how you have said your words are beautiful..looki lo forward for more

    1. Thank you.

  71. good luck – with your journey and alexa!
    I am looking forward to reading and finding some inspiration from your journey 🙂

  72. I loved the three questions!! Esp.. aren’t we responsible for our own well-being?
    Great read

  73. Papri Ganguly says:

    just love everything about this post .I can so relate myself. it is like a self motivation for me

  74. Nisha Malik says:

    What a great start Varsha. Loves it. Look forward to more of such great work.

  75. Sometimes motivation needs to be repeated. Daily dose of inspiration to continue what we are doing.
    🙂

  76. I liked the way you have expressed your heart felt thoughts more than anything else. And to top it, I can sense your commitment towards achieving your goal. All the best.

  77. I too am fighting my Marwari genes and losing.

    1. Marwari genes are quite determined, aren’t they? 🙂
      Hope you win, Nupur. Thanks for reading.

  78. I believe in “love your self”. Was really a good write-up

  79. heart and mind matters, and also your appearance. Self love is important t.

    1. True. Thanks for reading, Tina.

  80. I reached this realization quite late… making small improvements now… uphill battle though

    1. Better late than never, Roshan. Uphill may be tough but it isn’t impossible. Small steps can make a huge difference. All the best. Thanks for stopping by.

  81. Very motivating!
    Thanks for sharing your journey. #myfriendalexa #surreads #blogchatter

    1. Thanks for reading, Surbhi.

  82. With you on this journey😊😊

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