Just rambling, Such is life, Whines and whispers, Women

The One where I did the Unthinkable

Some relationships don’t work out. They just don’t. It isn’t about who or what went wrong or where. Sometimes patience gets stretched too much at the seams, the cloth ripping off noisily with no scope for mending. One can try salvaging it with momentary patchwork but the fact remains that when time runs out for a relationship, it’s more or less conclusive. Ours too went through the motions of frustration, desperation, and veiled warnings until the unthinkable happened, and I was the one to pull the plug on it.

The One where I did the Unthinkable_avibrantpalette

The decision wasn’t an easy one. The road ahead was lonely, to say the least, and something I had never been prepared for. I became apprehensive as the enormity of it all slowly dawned upon me. More than four years had passed since we first crossed paths. Even after the lockdown, we were back together as a horse to grass (pun unintended) and I warmly reopened the doors of my home to this person. All that had changed now. My safe space felt threatened and abandoned, repeatedly, and I couldn’t take it lying down. What about my husband and kids though? Would they understand and accept the imminent repercussions?

People around me were quick to point out the obvious. “Varsh, you’re being naïve. Accept the situation and play along. Everyone needs someone.” They said. How could I expect anyone else to care for my stuff if I wasn’t up to it myself though? A few tweaks could give my day, time, and body some real good and welcome shake. Yes, I could find someone else but looking at others shrug helplessly while being played at their hands wasn’t comforting and I wanted control. 🙁

A bond formed over shared cups of tea, frantic where-are-you calls, a healthy exchange of ‘information’ and recipe ideas, and celebrating festivals together couldn’t mean anything only to me, right? In the end, the horse needs only the grass it seems (pun intended). Determined hence, I finally took the plunge and fired my lazy, work-shirking, and habitually absent housemaid. (Drumrolls and slow claps for me please!) 😀 😀

P.S: It has been months since the unthinkable happened and, although it gets challenging at times, I seem to have handled it pretty well. I might get a replacement if and when the tasks get overwhelming but I don’t see it happening yet. Tailing them around the house and constant supervision are much more draining. Also, now I know how most housemaids don’t gain any weight. Daily squats, abs, and upper body workouts are a boon. 😉

This blog post is part of the blog challenge ‘Blogaberry Dazzle’ hosted by Cindy D’Silva and Noor Anand Chawla in collaboration with Dr. Preeti Chauhan.

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24 thoughts on “The One where I did the Unthinkable

  1. I was wondering who was harming your space. And then comes the househelp! True, following them around is more taxing and doing your work yourself is faster and better, provided you have the time. Happy weight loss and better muscles too.

      1. Oh boy! I can’t tell you who I thought that other person was😛. Such a smart storyteller you are… hahaha! wow! you really gave up on your maid? In my hometown, maids are rare n women manage house work and their jobs very well but I can’t imagine doing that in the city. I don’t mean to sound discouraging… I have thought about it too but I decided not to as it didn’t make sense to me to give it up when I have both the need and means to outsource and doing jhaadu, pochha n bartan won’t help me in any way… infact when I was doing it in COVID it used to stress me out as I was working n working without help n the rest of the family was idle. But again, I guess it’s ‘to each his own.’ and I am glad that you are handling it well. Still, I hope you change your mind Varsh.🥺

        1. Aww, I remember the Covid days and the endless work too. I’ll hire a maid but as of now this is working out. I want my perfect shape back first. 😀

  2. Hahaha! I somehow thought it would lead to this, and yet, the way you narrated it made me guffaw! Yep, you’re right. If we can do what she does, we’d be fit and strong.

  3. Running around them really is quite a stress, I agree. However, after moving to Netherlands, I always tell people back in India that, “Tumhare paas option to use karo na yaar!”
    But hats off to your decision. It’s a really brave one and I wish you strength and optimism

  4. Varsha let me confess…my mind went the wrong way at the start.. 🙁 . and you know what I mean…… but when I progressed and come to the end …. Oh Varsha you just nailed it honey… didnt even gave the wildest guess about who you are talking about. You are stupendously fantastic my dear. Love you

  5. It took me a while to understand you were talking about the housemaid. I have a rule. Do it yourself if you can. If they know you are not completely dependent on them, they don’t trouble.

  6. Hats off to you, Varsha! Most of us tolerate the tantrums because of the lack of time. But as they say, sometimes it is best to take the matter into your own hands. And if we have to make time, we find a way.

  7. Oh gosh! I can’t believe I’m reading this and know that you’re also having some househelp issues like in our side of the world. For me though, I’ve learned to love and appreciate technology. Maximize the use of them, robot vacuum, washing machine/dryer, dishwasher, and of course, help from everyone in your household is at most important. I tell everyone in our household (despite being a stay-at-home-mom) that if you are part of this family, you have a responsibility in the house as well. Responsibility = chores. This way, everyone is mindful of their mess and you don’t need to stress yourself too much and be hard on yourself. I’m glad you’re able to get rid of your househelp if she’s doesn’t play her part.

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