Just rambling, People, Sharing views, Such is life

Seeking answers

Normally easy-going, yet not someone who can easily let anyone close. I’m possibly an omnivert, but also quite a confused soul when it comes to bracketing myself into any accurate category. I’m mostly the silent member of a group and refuse to be part of any camp as such.

How easy is it for you to let down your guard and accommodate someone in your time and life without yourself getting affected by it? 

Is it easy for you to be friends with your friend’s friends? 

Can you make your discomfort apparent, if any? 

Is keeping your priorities unchanged for anyone a bad thing? 

33 thoughts on “Seeking answers

    1. It is not about being comfortable Neha. It is more like wondering, why are some things so natural for others while you can’t bring yourself to do them. No way we can change us for others anyway.
      Thanks for being here Neha. ☺

    1. No hidden trigger Akhila. Have been pondering about it, so thought I might get a different view about it. Deep down we all are different, right?

  1. First of all congrats for coining this new term Omnivert :). I love such “question – answer” type blog posts where there is scope for some discussion, banter and to some extent dispute as well.

    I have really not been able to categorize myself too but i find it very easy to get a common ground to gel with most people…You have asked about being comfortable with friend’s friend, i am amused to find that at times i have been friends with many such two people who dont see eye to eye…Its just that i love to listen more tahn speak…

    I find it extremely difficult to make apparent my displeasure unless the person is an extreme case in which mostly i would just stop talking rather than saying something negative…

    I dont think its bad to unchange your priorities the only important thing is to communicate this in a way which isnt offensive to the person and most people understand…

  2. Wow…I loved your comment. You answered everything. ☺

    It might just be me, but I find communicating a lot easier through the written word. Obviously, it isn’t possible everywhere and can also lead to misinterpretations easily.

    I’m a little impulsive with people. I do give them chances, but beyond a point I know I’m done with them and simply shut off. I’m saying this despite the fact that I’ve never left anyone alone in time of need.

    People tend to take us for granted, that’ why I mentioned the priority point. Commitment doesn’t necessarily mean giving the permission to be walked over.

    The right word is ambivert, actually. But I like omnivert better. So, yes, its coined by me. Thanks. ☺

  3. Thanks for appreciating the comment…I do find it a coincidence that in many cases our thought processes match especially when it comes to how we like to interact with people…
    I realized long ago that my over expectations with people to hurting , i would try to turn out to be best possible/emotionally attached friend, brother,son…however when people wouldnt care it would make me act impulsive (and look worst in their eyes) with them leading to creation of bad blood..

    overtime i have learnt to not expect much from people and to be less emotional and more practical although its difficult to change one’s basic nature entirely so sometimes a facade is needed so that one doesnt appear vulnerable to be taken advantage of…

    1. You echoed my thoughts, really. It is a strange coincidence.

      When I was younger writing was a release for me. Everybody thought I was a quiet child but no one realised that I found it difficult to convey my feelings to anyone. I had very few close friends and deliberately or unknowingly they ended up hurting me too.

      Yes, so going away or like you said keeping a facade is a way to save ourselves from the pain again. Practical approach. And it helps. Emotions aren’t to be wasted on everyone.

          1. i think the conversation naturally flowed that way and its in a way good for us to express our thoughts freely. Last time also while discussing songs with you i found that conversation very feel good. May be as human we feel good to express ourselves well before someone giving proper listening and here i think we both are good listener and good at expressing thoughts 🙂

          2. Hmm…I agree. It is reassuring to talk to someone who won’t judge you by the revelations you make or lecture you over your actions. Naturally flowing conversations have a certain warmth about them.
            I liked the songs conversation too. Next time we’ll pick up some other topic. Movies? ☺????

          3. Yes that true and infact i really am not scared of being judged anymore…i am way past that period..Yes, being little extra sensitive such judgment hurt and may spoil some sleep but thats about it 🙂
            Movies are another huge interest area and try my best to watch them as much as possible..there was a time in past when i was single i would watch two theatre shows in a day !!

            Two new good movies are getting released (Mohanjodaro and Rustam), will watch atleast one and may be make review of it a blog post 🙂 🙂

          4. Grown-ups ki nishani..sleep or here don’t sleep over it and forget it! ☺
            My movie-watching has reduced drastically coz of my kids now. Theatres only if there’s some kids movie. A sees movies like crazy. Even the bad ones. Then he scrutinizes it and makes my life hell. ????????
            Rustom I want to see too. Mohenjodaro I want to wait for reviews. The promos aren’t as exciting as I had expected, though I love Hrithik Roshan.

          5. Okay we watched jungle book with kids so they too oblige us when needed. Akshay kumar movies are normally liked by all of us so yes that will be priority.
            We watched Rithik at kapil sharma show and we both felt as if he is growing younger!! 🙂

          6. Oh Hrithik Roshan will be the male Rekha someday. He is beyond gorgeous. Am I’m saying this even though I’m a devout Salman Khan fan. ????
            A Jr is game for any movie, but Angel, well she switches from seeing the movie, jumping on our laps, going up and down the stairs and howling to leave from the theatre, all within an hour. So you can imagine. ???? Laptop or television are better options for movies. ????

          7. Male Rekha hahaha The person is made of steel coping so well with so much happening in personal life..
            Angel acts her age so i can understand its not convenient to go to theatre, mine are little grown up so there is no issue provided they are also enjoying the show 🙂

          8. We cannot imagine the stress these people must be going through on a daily basis. I had read in one of Salman Khan’s interviews long back. ‘Everything about us is public. Even heartaches and failures.’
            Our lives are much simpler. Angel is a tantrum-queen in the making. Very picky..very stubborn. But she’s a delight to be around. Her smile literally lights up everything! ????????

          9. Yes Varsha we are far lucky that way to have loving partners and a wonderful family…Its really delightful to know about Angel..my love and blessings to her…Always miss having a daughter ..May be we will have to wait till sons get married to have a daughter cum daughter in law ????????

          10. Thank you so much Parijat. Daughters are precious, really. I’m glad I had her. My life would be incomplete without her.

  4. Well… I am a bit similar personality as in, I am friendly n easy going but I don’t like people meddling in my pvt affairs… It’s like I have a line which shouldn’t be crossed even in friendships, some understand n some don’t…

    And I am chatter box in one to one discussions, but in groups I am always a listener, who is going to spend energy when all are talking together, someone should listen right…

    Over time because I have been through judged n misjudged phase in friendship. I have stopped trying to please everyone. I let them know my reasons why I can’t prioritise them, if they understand well n good and if not that’s OK, as they have their reasons too. We are all different after all.
    I have gotten into a phase where I have less expectations from others n high expectations from myself.

    Hope my answers helps u in some way 🙂

    1. Yes, yes, yes!
      You just summarised my whole post Shefali! You just mentioned everything I would say about myself. Silent in groups, expectations only from myself now and also fiercely guarding my private affairs.
      This was helpful and reassuring. Thank you! ☺

  5. God.. I fall into the trap all time.. God knows how many people have come and stayed with me when they first arrive in uk and now they don’t even talk to me..

    But when they need someone to pick them from airport.. a place to live for the first few days.. blah blah blah then they have a idiot just there called BIKRAM.. ????????????

    Don’t know why I wrote this here.. but I do try my best to change and I just can’t manage to do that..

    So yes it’s very easy for me to call a friends friend my friend.. etc etc etc..

    1. You are exactly like a friend of mine. He does the same thing. Helps everyone irrespective of how bad they’ve been with him. We fight a lot about it because I hate to see him getting mistreated and hurt again and again. He doesn’t change, sadly.
      I know why you mentioned it. Dil ki baat zubaan pe aa gayi. And its ok. You should let it out once in a while.
      Being cold and distant isn’t possible for everyone. Some are born like that. Some learn over time.

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