A Junior, Me, Mothers, Women

Thanks my new friend :)

Four years ago: Marriage, dreams, aspirations.

Two years ago: Career, financial independence, freedom.

Currently: Career on a backseat, husband provided expenses, responsibilities.

The story of my existence can be summed up in these past four years. Why? Because the life that I had before getting married has almost faded into oblivion. What I did, what I liked or what I hated before this has no bearing on my actions or preferences now.  There are days when these things frustrate me, there are days when I want a break, but then there are also days when I feel grateful for them.

It is all about setting priorities and sticking to them. And when you have done that, be sure that you did the right thing. I decided to be a full-time Mom ‘se I didn’t want to leave A Jr with a babysitter or a day-care. I wanted to see him grow up with my own eyes, didn’t want to miss any of the cute things he does. I did just that. My career suffered, the loneliness at home was killing, and the demands of motherhood were daunting and exhausting. I got a bit tired of it.

But today, I met someone and things turned around. I met a lady whose son is A Jr’s playgroup-mate. The kid’s younger than A Jr and has just started school. Understandably, she was anxious about her son’s doing, the way I was during A Jr’s first week. It took all but one smile from me and she joined me in waiting for our respective kids. We got talking and hit it off almost instantly. Her story was similar to me. She left her job after her son was born and is a full-time Mom now. The situations and experiences she mentioned sounded very similar to mine.

She doesn’t even know this, but after talking to her I felt more confident and sure of myself. Not that I needed a proof of it, but seeing someone in the same shoes as mine made me feel like I had company. I was not alone out there. It felt heartening to finally have someone who’s riding the same boat with you and wants to know if she’s rowing it properly. I’m sure I’ll look forward to meeting her everyday and talk about everything under the sun with her.

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14 Comments

  1. I guess friends in the same situation as we are the most comforting because we can relate at many levels I guess. Good luck with bringing up A jr.

  2. I love your decision Varsh 🙂 One should not regret any action in life… especially those concerning kids 🙂 Have the joy of ur lifetime growing up with A jr 🙂

  3. @Analyst: True…when you can identify with a certain situation or person a bond is formed automatically…thanks 🙂

  4. @Pinsy: I know….retrospection is ok…but its better if one doesn't dwell on it too much…helps more if one focuses on the future… and kids should always be a priority is what I feel..Thanks dear 🙂

  5. Decisions made with a calm mind are not to be regretted..and I am glad you don't regret yours. Enjoy your time with A Jr.. the rest will come with time.. 🙂

  6. So you found a humdard and humsafar for your mornings. Now you wont have to kill time at D-mart 😉 🙂

  7. @Comfy: True…very true…we can't have it all, can we? You win some, you lose some…Thanks Comfy dear…it means a lot to me! 🙂

  8. @G: Oh yes….but know what…my humdard and humsafar and me went to D-mart together today! :PBut yes…it is indeed refreshing to be able to peep out of my book and enjoy real company 🙂

  9. That is a great thing Varsh! there are many many more out there who have taken this decision. This is pure woman's liberation isn't it? I mean to be able to do what you want to do even if it means taking a break from career? Enjoy your time with A Jr. You will have a bagful of fond memories for the time when he leaves home! 🙂

  10. @zephyr: Thanks zephyr :)I'd heard of many women taking breaks from their careers for their kids but this was the first time I met someone in that league. Talking with her felt very reassuring. I guess only a woman can go upto these lengths for her kid(s). I'm enjoying my time alright! He makes sure he keeps me on my toes all day. These memories are so precious, anything else in comparison seems worthless! 🙂

  11. This has to be some kind of record I guess, but i did this kind of stuff twice, once in 1980 and again in 2004. Never regretted it. At the end of the day only you know what you must do, and do it well. For your little ray of Sunlight.

  12. You are right as long as you think you're doing the right thing..and after seeing you that day…lady I know that you've taken a right decision :)Good luck on that and YAY for the new friend 🙂

  13. @UK: You took a break twice? Now that's a new one, but brave nevertheless. True, only we can set and stand by our priorities. I hope I'm a doing a good job of it too..Thanks for your words and welcome here! 🙂

  14. @Nu: Ya..its ourselves we need to convince the most at the first place…and am glad I took tht decision then, for A Jr as well as me. Thanks Nu! 🙂

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